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September 20, 2004
if everyone had children: some olympic sports
1. prepare a meal with an 11-month-old clinging to calves
2. barf-catch with a bucket
3. speed-shower
4. chase baby up the stairs before he falls, quietly enough so he doesn't turn around, think it's a game, and climb faster giggling
5. race to shut the toilet lid
6. race to cats' water bowl
7. race to pack lunches, make breakfast, brush teeth, wash faces, comb hair, and put bodies on bus
8. one-handed diaper change (while the other hand keeps baby hands from reaching down and squishing in his own mess)
9. compose blog post in under 5 minutes and under the duress of multiple interuptions and constant background noise
10. orienteer through laundry, toys, books, furniture, and other miscellany to find that f$#!*ng binky!!
Posted by mryonker at September 20, 2004 02:13 PM
Comments
This really isn't in the same vein, but my most impressive maternal feat was assembling bunk beds. Not being "handy," I consider this one of the greatest accomplishments of my life and still can't quite believe I did it.
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