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January 31, 2005
mommy blogs
Well, some people are a little, uh, pissed off over the article that ran in the NYT this weekend about mommy blogs, especially those who were interviewed for it.
I just have a few things to say:
Most of the "mommy blogs" I read are not o n l y blogs about parenthood; in fact, many parents blog about a bunch of crap as well as parenting. In fact, I am in the midst now of working up some kind of half-assed argument that ANY blog that thinks it is a KIND of blog (parenting, cooking, research, diet, etc) is out of its gourd. Blogs resist this sort of mono-topic stuff.
I would also be interested to hear mom bloggers respond to why they blog about parenting (I don't suspect it's because they don't have anything else to write about). In fact, I'd wager that most of them are responding to audience currents.
The thing that is lighting people up most, though, is the stuff about mom bloggers being self-absorbed, attention- and validation-craving egotists.
Possibly? I'll grant that I'm self-absorbed. But I think all writers are, to an extent. And I would argue the same for attention-seeking: writers of all kinds seek some sort of attention through audience. But validation? I write about baby poop and vomit not because I need any kind of validation, I don't think. I write it because it's funny. Because it's real. Because it is what I'm surrounded by right now. Later, when I'm surrounded by teenagers who sneak out and steal cars, I'll blog on that. When my kids are gone, I'll blog about my dentures. Whatever.
But the last thing, here: the writer of this article appears to shun parents who wish to be acknowledged by the rest of the world, because, HELLO, parents frequently are the invisible silenced voice in the background of their children's lives. (Mom, help me out here.) Face it, we are the stage managers of our children's lives. The producers. The backers. The custodians in every sense of that word, but MOSTLY the mop-wielding sense.
By parenting, we accept and allow someone else to be the MOST IMPORTANT person(s) in OUR lives. It is selfless. It is hard, wrenching, thankless. It is not looking out for number one.
To blog is to put a voice back into that silence. Yeah, I might be arguing here that parents are oppressed. I just might.
We are oppressed when some dumbshit thinks they know why we do what we do.
Posted by mryonker at 02:59 PM | Comments (7)
January 30, 2005
time wasters
This courtesy my dear friend T in Miami, who I envy on a daily basis in the winter.
1. What time did you get up this morning? 8
2. Diamonds or pearls? Uh. I'd lose either. So neither. Plus if I had money to buy either, I'd buy an iPod instead. Or new running shoes. Shit, if I had enough money for jewelry, I'd buy both.
3. What was the last film you saw at the cinema? Cinema? I haven't stepped foot in a theater in YEARS. It was probably Forrest Gump.
4. What is your favorite TV show? ::sheepish grin:: Desperate Housewives, Las Vegas.
5. What did you have for breakfast? An egg over-easy and some toast.
6. What is your middle name? Ruth
7. Favorite cuisine? Indian or Thai.
8. What foods do you dislike? Brussel sprouts and lima beans. I'll eat anything else if it will sit still long enough
9. What is your favorite flavor? Almond.
10. What is your favorite CD at the moment? Me too, T! Josh Groban. LOOOve him.
11. What kind of car do you drive? 93 Montero. That is about to blow up, I think.
12. Favorite sandwich? Cream cheese, shaved ham, purple onions on something crusty.
13. What characteristic do you despise? The "front." Like, "don't front me." Wishy-washy inability to be straight foward.
14. Favorite item of clothing? Flannel sleeping pants. My students are wearing them in public, but I'm too afraid to.
15. If you could go anywhere in the world on vacation,
where would you go? Nepal
16. What color is your bathroom? Cranberry and cream
17. Favorite brand of clothing? Thrify Shopper, Salvation Army, Goodwill.
18. Where would you retire to? To an RV to travel.
19. Favorite time of the day? Anytime of day that the baby is sleeping.
20. What was your most memorable birthday? I was 7 and my mom made us play this game where we had the names of famous characters pinned to our backs and we had to ask each other yes/no questions to guess who we were. Someone was Daisy Duke, but not me. Also, I remember my mom let me wear this hideous striped long-sleeved shirt under a flowered smock-like dress. Always fashion-challenged, me.
21. Where were you born? Omaha, NE
22. Favorite sport to watch? Baseball.
24. Person you expect to send it back first? Hey, I'm bloggin this.
25. What laundry detergent do you buy? Arm and Hammer. Cheap and gets the stains out. ;)
26. When is your birthday? January 29th, 1976
27. Are you a morning person or a night person? Neither. I can wake up early and stay up late.
28. What is your shoe size? 8.5
29. Do you have any pets? 3 Cats: Ginger, Muffin, and Stinky (or Crack Rock) [a stray we just took in].
30. Any new and exciting news you'd like to share with your family & friends? My baby goes to sleep by himself now. Yes, this is exciting to me.
31. What did you want to be when you were little? A teacher
32. What are you doing today? Birthday party at Chuck E Cheese, easing back into running (4 miles), and prepping for a mini-seminar on using blogs--that begins tomorrow, and I only have TWO slides so far.
33. If there was one thing you could do right now, $ is no object, what would you do? Quit school and write fiction, open a yoga studio, and hire a cook.
34. If you only had a few days left on earth, what would you do? Blog. :)
Posted by mryonker at 09:58 PM | Comments (0)
January 29, 2005
I don't know who Von Ferber is, but...
Misery always loves companyhere, Bad Mother feels my pain, and a little of her own as well.
I had the gagging, but not the vomitting; I'm counting myself lucky.
Posted by mryonker at 07:56 AM | Comments (0)
happy birthday to me!
Yep, I'm an olllld lady. 29.
The sleep experiment worked well last night. Josh did wake up twice. The first time I nursed him in bed and then stuck him back in the crib; the second time it felt like about 500am so I kept him in bed with us.
All in all, a much more pleasant and restful night than I've had in over a year.
The experiment shall continue.
Posted by mryonker at 07:46 AM | Comments (9)
a day of not-quite firsts
So, I've been fretting lately, here and elsewhere, about the baby. Or toddler. Or monster demon child. I was on the phone with my cookie mom** today, and the baby walks by me and lets loose with a shriek that would wake Hades. Just for the hell of it, apparently, because he was not hurt and nowhere near a cat to be either excited by or scratched by. Cookie mom asks me "Omigod what happened? Is he OK?"
Yeah, he's OK. He just, you know, screams a lot. Frequently. And he can scream with an intense, glass-shattering high pitch AND a low gutteral vibration at the SAME time. People in India train for years to do this. In fact, Brian found that I have a recording program on my iBook just the other day, so I just may record this superhuman noise and post it here for your listening pleasure. hahaha. Like it would be "pleasurable." :)
So, I fret about him. Mostly because he still nurses and still wakes up several (and by several I mean 5-10) times a night to nurse. Actually, he nurses to sleep, and wakes up if I attempt to remove myself. Or if I roll over. Or if I breathe.
Today we made a little progress. I put him in his crib, which he rarely sleeps in, at 1100 am. At 1120, he fell asleep. Without a boob, without rocking. With a good amount of screaming (and screaming and screaming and gagging on his own saliva and screaming and gagging), of course.
Tonight, I put him in his crib. He cried a little. I rubbed his back a little. BUT THEN HE WENT TO SLEEP, praise Yahweh. It is nearly midnight, and he sleeps THERE, not under my boob. I'll report back in the morning.
(This is a near-first, because Hannah did sleep in a crib for a couple of months.)
The second near-first: I now own a cellular phone. Apparently, Brian felt that since every car I drive could break down at any time, it would be a good thing for me to carry a phone. I'm ambivalent. I was actually proud to be a non-phone entity, though I am embarrassed to admit the number of times I have mooched minutes from other people.
(This is a near-first because we had one briefly while I was pregnant with Hannah, but quickly realized that we couldn't afford it AND a baby.)
UP NEXT: a report from the Geography Department's colloquium, where Sharon Moran reported on the water cycle, septic tanks, and composting toilets! Good, good stuff.
**for those of you unschooled in the jargon of Girl Scouts, the cookie mom is the GODDESS who takes care of keeping track of money, ordering and dispensing cookies, going to meetings for cookie sales, setting up booth sales, and earning ALL my gratitude and possibly a gift certificate for a massage because I DON'T WANT TO DO THAT
Posted by mryonker at 12:09 AM | Comments (0)
January 27, 2005
the title of her blog is worth it
OK, I have a confession: the blogroll you see at the left? It's not mine. It's from about 4 months ago. I'm a bad blogger; I need to update it horribly.
But it's gotten so far behind that I couldn't possibly introduce all the new people that live in my bloglines account. But one does deserve a bit of talking-up: Bad Mother. The title is, to me, brave and ironic in one: if she really were a *bad* mom, she wouldn't be admitting it. But she, like all moms who try soooo hard (warning: horribly sweeping generalization to follow!!), always feels as though she's falling a bit short.
I link to her here mainly for my own self; in this particular post she talks about how her daughter normally receives the brunt of her wrath. My daughter, indeed, becomes the one I shriek and swing at. H, who is 8, is soo like me. She is snippy and rude and self-important. She argues and backtalks and thinks she's got all the answers. She gets in trouble at dance for telling other kids that they're doing it wrong.
She is just like me, and I don't want her to be. I want her to be gentle and mindful and generous.
But I snip at her and tell her she does things wrong and tell her to quit arguing and yelling as I'm arguing and yelling at her.
Hm.
Posted by mryonker at 11:16 PM | Comments (3)
a new favorite :)
I am a candy bar junkie. It's really not a cool thing, since I'm such a health nut wannabe. In fact, I'm inching toward being a vegetarian again, simply because meat is so damn expensive. Plus I don't like to cook it, either. I am terrified of my kids eating half-cooked chicken, or worse, *me* eating half-cooked chicken ::gag:: I make a mean chicken soup, but only after I boil the hell out of the bird parts.
Oh, I digress. But here comes another one: I tried making cannellini (damn spell check doesn't work in Safari!) patties last night (out of a beloved Mooooosewood cookbook), but they were dry. And tasteless. And pasty. Did I mention gross? They were. The strange baby, who doesn't eat much of anything, ate them, but no one else did, including my brother who will return after a night shift at UPS and eat a leftover bowl of soggy cornflakes someone left out.
To the point, here: my birthday's coming up. :) B brought me an early present tonight: a hershey's Take 5 bar. I about had a...well, it was soooo good. Luckily, they're vegetarian.
In other news: I may win the award for the laziest Brownie leader. Our meeting tonight consisted of me bringing a kid's yoga DVD, shoving the couch in the church library to one side of the room, and sitting on said couch as my 10 Brownies grunted and giggled through the routine.
Well, then we went to the kitchen and made yogurt (damn spell check-lack) and fruit smoothies. So, I did a *little*.
Posted by mryonker at 10:42 PM | Comments (1)
January 22, 2005
Um, yes, I agree
Just came across this via susansinclair.
I always *felt* this way, that people who don't have kids could only attempt to sympathize with or understand those of us whose lives are marked by the indelible smear of vernix. It's just nice to hear someone else say it, so I don't have to.
Posted by mryonker at 07:45 PM | Comments (5)
if I wasn't pissed, I'd be worried
My day, so far (and this is, hello, a Saturday):
730: up and shower
800: wake kids, dress and feed them
830: leave house for dance lessons
1100: return to house, find B. JUST WAKING UP
1200: feed kids lunch
100: 3-hour-long family-wide Pac-Man tournament (which illustrates the fact that we have done NOTHING TIRING TODAY)
400: B. lies down again for a NAP.
530: B. continues to sleep.
530: I begin to fume.
530: I consider sneaking out the house with the kids so he wakes at about 900 pm and wonders if he slept through Sunday.
530: I wonder, briefly (as I sometimes do), whether indeed he has some sort of sleep disorder, or if I really am married to a huge slacknerny.
Posted by mryonker at 05:27 PM | Comments (0)
January 20, 2005
blog hog heaven (hog blog heaven?)
I think I may keel over with excitement. I am actually in a class that REQUIRES me to post to my blog! Plus, I get to post to another blog along with a bunch of very cool people, some of whom I have only talked about behind their backs (hi Clancy!).
So, this means that during my hour of work each night, I CAN BLOG and call it work.
That aside: the real issue of today is this: someone in our small sleepy village is OUT TO GET US. If you know this blog, you know that my dear husband has a bit of a, ahem, truck-buying habit. He's a mechanic and has a hard time passing up a good deal. Normally he limits himself to rarer things (Vanagons, diesel Toyotas, four wheel drive Civics), though sometimes he gets what we need (mini-vans).
We moved to a small small village north of Syracuse last year. We had two vehicles then. Our neighbors were all very friendly.
Now we have (god, should I list them? what the hell): 4X Dodge Ram Cummins Diesel (the "plow truck"); 4X Toyota PU; 4X Toyota PU Diesel; Izuzu PU Diesel; Blazer; Caravan; 2 Monteros; and one Subaru Justy. Plus, my brother has an Escort. We have a two car garage that three of these vehicles are parked in. We have a shed in the back yard where another is parked (and completely invisible from the street).
Before Christmas we got a friendly letter from the village zoning dude saying that we were committing heinous zoning violations because we had "abandoned/junk vehicles"on our premises. Brian went to the dude, asked him what the deal was, and the dude told him that as long as the vehicles that were parked in the driveway were registered, we were fine. He gave us 30 days to fix it.
So. Brian squeezed one more car into the garage (hence the three cars in the two-car garage). Registered and insured the Justy. Problem fixed?
Apparently not. Since we didn't get rid of any of the cars, who ever doesn't like looking at our cars has turned us into the zoning board for another alleged violation: running a business out of a home/residence.
I'm very sorry, but there is no business going on here. Certainly Brian sells a car once in a while when we need something else, but we're not, I repeat NOT, making any kind of income on this venture. It would be nice, but it just ain't happenin'. We're lucky if we break even.
So. I guess we're lucky that there isn't any zoning law that restricts the number of vehicles we can have, or else they would have slapped us with that one from the get-go. What torks me is that someone is wasting their time worrying about what my driveway looks like. Actually, I pity the fool who has nothing better to do with his time than turning people in for petty (and false!) zone violations.
That person should get himself a blog.
Posted by mryonker at 10:28 PM | Comments (8)
January 19, 2005
stingy with the wireless
I am the intern for the Writing Program's technology guru. I get to sit in his office and participate in tales of woe, cries for help, curses, shrieks, and (sometimes) simple how-do-I-do-this queries from teachers and students alike.
Yesterday a staffer popped into the office to ask how to set her wireless hub at home so that it blocked unauthorized users.
Now, normally I sit quietly and listen to George's wisdom. Rarely, if ever, do I volunteer advice or opinions unless they are solicited.
But yesterday I was shocked.
"You mean," I interjected, "you don't want me to park outside your house with my laptop and borrow your connection?" I half-joked.
"Yeah," she says.
"Really? You don't want to share?"
"No way," she says. "They're not paying for it; I am. They can get their own connection."
I turn to George. "Now, if I *do* sit outside her house in my car catching her signal, does that slow her connection down?"
"Only if, say, 20 people parked in her driveway at the same time to use it."
I turn back to the inquirer, who, at this point, is getting a bit defensive. "Nothing's being *taken* from you. Why do you feel the need to lock it down?"
"Because it's mine. I'm paying for it."
Well. I let it drop, though I probably could have continued ribbing her for her paranoia and stingyness for several more minutes.
Is it because I'm a near-socialist that I would be happy to share my wireless with a neighbor? HAPPY. I mean it. I'm paying for it anyway, and it's not like portions of food that disappear with increased mouths or electricity that costs more as your draw increases.
It reminded me of this article I saw on BoingBoing a few weeks back: Philly prepares to offer free WiFi citywide. I went back to the article and realized that this isn't the start of the utopia it should be, and even that this move might be a BAD idea if it will prevent other urban areas from being able to institute similar programs.
At any rate. I will not be locking down my wireless hub anytime soon.
Posted by mryonker at 09:06 AM | Comments (11)
January 17, 2005
the battery red
With my battery indicator showing that sliver of red, I finish an hour of work that commences the hour of work I will do for six days a week from now until all current pressing projects are finished. I thank 43 Folders, which is fast becoming one of my fave sites, for this plan of action (AKA overcoming my PERSONAL SUCK).
That list of projects will not exist here--I need to post them for people in my house to see so that I have some sort of physical evidence that my existence here is not simply as the maid, cook, wet nurse, baby sitter, and nag. I'd like to get a huge cork board to hang above my desk so that I can post things like "CURRENT PROJECTS"--indeed, a kind of print-based billboard blog for a very specific readership (too bad the monster can't read).
I have wrangled one supporter, kind of: after a brief but helpful talk with the H this evening (which consisted of him asking "What's bothering you?" and me listing all the stuff I didn't get done last semester and all the stuff I have to do this semester and nearly crying because I'd much rather be a dental hygienist), he said, "It's 10:00. You can work for an hour. But NO BLOGGING."
Hm.
Posted by mryonker at 11:42 PM | Comments (0)
flail, a little
I flail at the cusp of classes beginning tomorrow.
In a frenzy of domestic prowess-wanna-be, I spent this afternoon whipping up a fabulous cream of zucchini carrot bisque and some delectable raspbery almond bars.
I spent the late afternoon/early evening (until now) eating a bowl of soup, a raspberry bar, a bowl of soup, a raspberry bar, etc.
I'm nursing a sore knee, and off the training schedule until Thursday; however the forecast calls for a high of NINE that day, so I might be resting until Friday.
In other (flailing) news: working to find a crib for the monster toddler. He still is not sleeping through the night (at 15 months) and after polling my fellow mother-friends, have realized that not all kids prefer to sleep-share. It is hard for me to believe, but at this point I'm willing to try anything.
Further, if he is not in bed with us, it will be easier for me to stop nursing him several times a night (to shut him up, as it were). Which in turn will make it easier for me to wean him.
Hopefully when monster toddler is 16 he won't happen upon these archives and find me calling him a monster. If he does, let me say this: Joshua, I love you Bob-bob. You are cute and loveable and a bring a great deal of laughter and joy to this house. But right now, you have removed the cable from my laptop and are chewing the plug AND grabbing for the keys. And you keep saying "Hot. Hot."
(Do ethernet cables carry an electric current like phone wires?)
I love you Joshua. You are a challenge. You are my baby. But you are a M O N S T E R.
Posted by mryonker at 05:49 PM | Comments (2)
January 12, 2005
staggering, horribly riveting photos
Someone has compiled before/after satellite photos of various coasts of Indonesia and Sri Lanka.
Posted by mryonker at 07:46 PM | Comments (0)
the perils of being a stay-at-home
1. It's 4:01 and I'm still in the sweatshirt and pants I slept in. I would admit to not even brushing my teeth yet, but I won't.
2. Monster toddler turns off computer as I'm working on methods essay.
3. Monster toddler climbs on the curtains as I attempt to hem them, breaking the last sewing machine needle I have.
4. Monster toddler takes nap long enough for me read 3 blogs from aggregator (+/- 10 mins).
5. Monster toddler gleefully grabs and flings piles of laundry as I fold it.
6. Each trip to the kitchen finds me leaving with food (grapes, brownies, grasshoppers, pbf, left over chicken stew...I swear I've eaten lunch 4 times over today).
7. Lovely pre-schooler watches Land Before Time (#11 Invasion of the TinySauruses) a third time; he WOULD be better off a someone else's house! If only the Monster toddler would take an interest in TV!
8. I start wishing for a 9-5 corporate gig that requires that I wear pantyhose, high heels and manicured fingernails; surely my self-worth would skyrocket by leaps and bounds. Surely my conversations at the water cooler would be more stimulating than: "No!" "Hot!" "Don't touch!" "Yucky!" "Uh-oh!" "Yes, Kitty Cat. Stinky kitty cat."
Posted by mryonker at 04:16 PM | Comments (4)
toothpaste works!!
This morning while checking the closings and delays, I happened to watch a clip on beauty myths on _Good Morning America_. They debunked several, but confirmed one: toothpaste does dry zits out! A friend from high school let me in on the secret (Amy from Roosey, if you're out there, thanks!). I've been putting toothpaste on my face at night now for years. Not only does it make you smell minty-fresh and feel tingly, but it saves money on zit cream. (Yeah, like I can afford anything from Clinique. Gimmee a break. And yes, living in my house IS like some insane reality-survivor TV show.)
By the way: two-hour delay. :( I am a BAD MOM!
Posted by mryonker at 09:32 AM | Comments (0)
January 08, 2005
I will need a booster seat AND bricks on the pedals
Children under 4 feet 9 inches need a booster.
There are several ironies here, the most poignant being the fact that most families with multiple children (and lower incomes, and I count myself among such families) pass seats and booster seats down to younger sibs for economic reasons. I am inclined to cry "conspiracy" against manufacturers for lobbying such a law into being. Laws that require people to BUY MORE STUFF always make me itch.
A second irony, of course, is the fact that if I were a couple inches shorter, I myself would need a booster seat.
A third irony: officers will now have to carry tape measures along with guns, radios, and other apparatus on their belts.
Maryland passed a similar law recently concerning weight: if a child weighed under 70lbs, they were required to sit in a booster seat. Again, several pounds lighter, *I* would have to sit in one. Things are getting a little ridiculous, in my opinion.
Posted by mryonker at 08:45 PM | Comments (2)
can we bring back the roller derby?
what happens when it snows for hours outside:
Char and Jack don their new rollerblades and commence the scratching up of the floor. :)
In other news, the 1.5 mile loop D and I have been running through our village has been seeming, uh, short. She and I on the phone this morning, after three quick loops (had to get the kids to dance):
Me: You know, I ran three loops the other day in about 40 minutes.
D: Yeah, my run the other night seemed speedy quick.
Me: Do you think it really can be 1.5?
D: Hm. I don't want to know for sure. I want to simply pretend. If it's shorter, we've got our training all wrong. But if IS 1.5...Chuck, what's 8 times 26? Maybe we could qualify for Boston.
Me: You are out of your mind. You ARE A RAVING LUNATIC.
D: Yeah, we probably run slower when we're together. We must unconsciously accomodate one another.
Me: Yeah, but if that's the case, we'll still run the 26 at 10 minute miles, unless we pretend we don't know each other. Well, I'm gonna clock it.
D: Um, you think?
Me: I gotta know.
And presto: the loop is indeed 1.5. I did indeed run 4.5 miles at 40 minutes. I've not been that fast since high school.
Of course, Brian would still say: That's still not a RUN. That's a trot . That's a lope. But not a run.
Well. I can call it what I want. :)
Posted by mryonker at 03:58 PM | Comments (0)
January 06, 2005
getting some stuff done
1. Wrote another page toward a reflective essay for my exams. The kids were out full force, as they enjoyed an early dismissal today (freezing rain this afternoon), but I was able to ignore them for about 20 minutes.
2. Started thinking HARD about this semester coming up (I refuse to say "spring"--it is so grey and cold that it is anything but the spring semester). I let George know that I will simply TA for his Digital Writing course; originally I wanted to get my hands a little dirtier than that (ie take over the class ;), but I have too much on my plate and really cannot be thinking about teaching anything. Instead, I promised to hang out, be available to bounce ideas back, help with tech stuff during/outside of class, and other underling TA duties.
3. Registered for the Shamrock. Here's D and I making sure the other doesn't put down a crazy finishing time.
4. Made reservations at the Holiday Inn Sunspree for one night, the Friday before the race. I think I will go ahead, if I haven't already lost out, and reserve Saturday night too. We're trying to be frugal, but this will be the FIRST TIME I've ever done anything that even looks remotely like a spring break (and granted, it will still be chilly-ish in VB mid-March), so I'm feeling a bit frivolous. Plus, what's the point of getting a hotel with a hot tub unless you can sit in that hot tub AFTER you hoof 26 miles?
5. Continued to belly ache about Josh and nursing. Oh, how I don't want to drive 10 hours with him!! Oh, how aware I am of the fact that he is MY LAST BABY and how fulfilling it is to feed a baby. OK, I'll let this rest for now.
6. Thought about ditching this typepad account, getting a domain, and setting up shop through MT so that I don't have to F with typepad. All the new crap with the wysiwyg is crapping up. Some browsers support it, some don't; now the scroll bar for this field is stuck and I can't scroll up to the top all the way.
7. Found George's copy of _Technopoly_, which I meant to read over the break. It was MIA for a while in VA and ended up in the baby's suitcase of all places. Maybe some reading tonight?
8. Did NOT: make dinner (Tucker, thanks), do dishes (Tuck again), or run laundry (Brian, thanks). I think Tucker's got a lady friend, so he's feeling a little spritely lately. He took the trash to the curb tonight, too.
9. Watched _Without a Trace_ and cried my eyes out at the end when she kept the baby. I'm such a sap.
Posted by mryonker at 11:52 PM | Comments (5)
January 05, 2005
when your baby will only eat garlic bagel crisps
oh, he likes to suck on double A batteries, too.
The dilemma: my lovely neighbor and I are travelling to Virginia Beach for spring break to run the Shamrock. I will be fulfilling a very important do-before-I-turn-30-goal (marathon). Other do-before-I-turn-30-goals include finish last degree (ain't happening), pay off debts (hello, student loan until I'm 90), and publish a poem in a *real* journal (44th Street at ODU just doesn't count) are all without reach. The marathon, however, is nearly doable. Nearly.
However, my little baby boy, who is 14 months now, is nowhere near ready to wean. He will not touch baby food, and will eat some adult food (cooked carrots, french fries, yogurt, garlic bagel crisps) but only for fun. He shuns kid food like pbj and applesauce, and if he's cranky-hungy, he doesn't want to do anything but nurse. He does drink water and milk from a cup quite well, but again, I suspect it's because he relishes the act, not because he is particularly thirsty.
So, how to leave for a weekend? I have already passed the Medela on to younger sister, who expects in Feb. Besides, I'm WAAAY past wanting to express. Do *I* wean him? I feel like if I do that, I'm being selfish AND I will starve him into eating real food. He and I have a tenuous relationship; he prefers Brian to me (unless he wants some boob), probably because I left him with Brian at three days old to go back to school. All I need is to further traumatize him.
So: the baby comes with? It's looking that way. It's not like we'll be partying or anything (neither D nor I are big drinker/partier peop), but I can see how a toddling body will cramp my driving style (he likes many things better than driving on long trips). It'll probably take us 10 hours now, insteaad of 8.5.
I mentioned to Brian: you know those leash seatbelts they make for dogs? Maybe we can use one for Josh. Then he can climb around the back seat to his heart's content, and we won't have to stop every 20 minutes to let him stretch his baby legs.
Brian wasn't amused.
Posted by mryonker at 02:53 PM | Comments (2)
January 04, 2005
blogs and audiences
Ok, time for a post that does some work. Luckily, my thoughts right now are highly in line with the aim of this blog (as a larger pieces of writing, but that calls for another entry in the future--they way the blog can exist as/from? several gestalts [all entries together, single entries, particular categories taken separately, entries+comments, etc]) which is making connections between "real life" and "work."
An issue I encounter lately, ever since blogging has punctured my periphery and moved to center, is the ways my interest in and composition of blog(s) is taken up by those of my family. I am forever defending it as a worthwhile venture; I face scorn, criticism, disdain, and near-ridicule from several adults who otherwise love me. The motif of said near-ridicule? Time. What a time-waster. I don't have time to read your blog. Don't you have something more important to do with your time? Where do you find the time? What's the point?
Ok, so that last one doesn't really fit. But still. The issue that I'd like to pull into relief is this: the point is community (I think). Community is WORTH time(/effort). But how to nurture one community (blogs), without abandoning another (home? family?).
Case: RIGHT NOW, I'm trying to think through this. Trying to make some sense. Trying to post. Jack plays Pac Man while Josh continually pushes the power button on the TV. I say "no!" to Josh. Jack hollers, turns the TV back on, eats some pellets; I write three words. Josh turns the TV off. I say "no!" Jack hollers, turns the TV back on, eats some pellets; I write two words.
I begin to RESENT them. God, I just want to do a little thinking!
And now, this post ends so I can keep them from breaking the TV. With no thought accomplished.
Posted by mryonker at 01:52 PM | Comments (6)
January 03, 2005
An upper. Or something.
The story concerning the REASON we had no heat yesterday is less funny and more scary. The company we deal with has been recently bought out by a larger company. When they put us on the delivery schedule, they (somehow?) put down our OLD (from 2 years ago) address. So our OLD house got 120 gallons worth of heating fuel that we were supposed to get, and then, of course, they were charging my account.
Posted by mryonker at 07:54 PM | Comments (2)
January 02, 2005
Look, if there was something pleasant to post about, I would!
It's 2 am Sunday morning. You pull off interstate 81 into lovely sleepy Parish, NY. The diesel engine in the truck your husband is driving growls as you take off at the end of the ramp.
The last day in VA is enough to make your whole family want to stay. 70 degrees. The kids jolly, playing on the swingset, riding bigwheels in the carport; you sitting happily in the sun, feeling it WARM your skin. Ah. But the truck was packed, heavy with presents and hand-me-downs from cousins and road snacks.
The drive home is leisurely. Stop north of Richmond, north of Fredricksburg, Opal. The kids run and run; you swing through a few sun salutations, as this will be the last you see of it.
Now you're back. Your husband unlocks the door, and you gather up the baby and kids. The air is cold and the baby gasps in his sleep as you hury him to the back door. You walk into the kitchen, and something isn't quite right. The baby is still gasping. You check the thermostat. IT READS 43!
The kids wake fully, shivering. You hear the furnace running--what's the problem? Lovely husband traipses to the basement, and you hear soft curses. No heating oil. Why have they not delivered? You paid the bill before you left. You are on automatic delivery. There should be NO PROBLEM. You should not have three blue-lipped children crying at your knees.
Your brother, who was home while you were gone, should have, um, NOTICED that it was colder than a witch's boob in the house?
Oh, apparently not, since all the beer is gone out of the fridge; he kept himself warm in other ways.
Brian asks you if you'd like to get in the truck and return to VA. At least there your children will not freeze to death.
So, you retrieve every blanket in the house (which, surprisingly, is quite a few). Find the space heater. Hang blankets to cordon off a section of the living room. Plug space heater in, put children on couch, cover them with four blankets, hunker down on the floor with several blankets of your own, and watch the space heater warily with visions of the damn house catching on fire the minute you fall sleep.
Welcome back to CNY.
Posted by mryonker at 12:42 PM | Comments (1)